weekend ko

I functioned as a normal person this weekend…I did the things that I usually don't do on a weekend.

I cleaned out my closet. I changed my bed sheet. I cleaned my room. All of a sudden I had the energy to do these things. I'm a bum on weekends. I don't do anything at all, the whole day. I just watch TV and DVD the whole day in my room,if I'm bored of watching TV I'll surf the net and maybe chat for a while if friends are online. That's how I exists on weekends and I love it:) I cherish these moments, to be honest:)

But today is a different day because I let go of the things that I have been keeping for years. Many times I've been wanting to let them go but never had the nerve to do it. Now it's time to let them all go and I did! I arranged everything as neatly as possible and it's not me 'cause I'm not really a very organized person. It's not that I love chaos, I'm just lazy sometimes. And I know, come Monday the chaos will start again. I'm not that good in maintaining orderliness but I'll survive.

I hope that I will be able to let go of some emotional stuff too that I've had for years, for some people…. just like I did when I let go of my valuables.

APO

…the song goes on…"mahirap talagang magmahal ng syota ng iba" by Apo Hiking Society. Mahirap talaga. Unrequited. No Hope. All thoughts. All feelings. No reality. You admire. You look. No chance. No Nothing…whew!

I guess, this is how others feel when we love someone who loves another. You can't do anything. You feel you'll lose the battle anytime. Well, is there really a battle to be won over nor one to fight for? As much as we want to say yes, we're having second thoughts…most of the time. Is it really worth it? Are we willing to go beyond? Are we ready? Do we take that one step and maybe hope that everything will go well? Not easy, isn't it? If we let go and take that leap, we'll hurt someone in the end. If we won't, we'll hurt ourselves in the process. So what now? Do we go for what we wish for or do we just let it pass us by hoping that it'll soon end and maybe tomorrow it'll all be gone?

Yes, maybe we've gone through this a lot of times already but still each experience is unique. Each person is special. Each encounter is incomparable. Maybe….You wonder…. what if? You make a plan…how? You wish…until when? It's a mess. Love is? Life is?

No. Just one chapter in our lives. One page. One memory. Just another heartache. It'll be gone soon.

….so the song ended…I was listening to a newly downloaded APO song. And that part of the song caught me..hehehe. Just thinking aloud….Ohhh…the song is playing again! I'm beginning to like it more and more:)